- Happy Monday, Sooners fans! A win is a win, right…? Maybe…? Okay, we’ve got a lot to talk about this week, so warm up your coffee and gather ‘round….
- “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way….” So began Charles Dickens’ 1859 novel A Tale of Two Cities. The quotation all-too-clearly also reflects my feelings on this year’s TCU game.
- There are some Sooners fans, the “Sunshine Pumpers,” who are in the glass-half-full camp, who may dislike certain things but who think the Oklahoma program is relatively strong. There are other fans, the “Negative Nancies,” who think that the program’s problems are systemic, and the flaws are growing into ever-bigger cracks.
- I didn’t think it was possible, but in this game, in microcosm, both sides were right.
- I’m a Sunshine Pumper, and I’ve got a lot to puff out my chest to when looking at the second and third quarters of this game. Dede Freakin’ Westbrook’s play simply cannot be ignored – he finally is looking like he might become this season’s Sterling Shepard. Jerald Moore and James Allen might need to give up their “Thunder and Lightning” monikers to Samaje and Joe. Baker was responsible for four touchdowns, and played with grit and a focus to win. And the team showed the kind of fight we became accustomed to last season.
- I DON’T CARE WHAT PLANET YOU COME FROM (part 1): When your team goes on a 42-3 run, I don’t care what planet you come from, your offense and your defense are BOTH kicking some serious ass – and against a ranked conference opponent playing at home, no less. 260-79 was the game’s running differential. Romar and Walker made some big plays on the D-line, and OBO-Wan Kenobi™ was strong with the Force. Every coaching call was like they set the Playstation on easy mode. I think I can safely say that this was the best Sooners performance I’ve seen since OU beat Alabama in the Sugar Bowl.
- But I can’t disagree with the Negative Nancies, and good gracious, the first and fourth quarter of this game, we were, in a word, EXECRABLE. Baker Mayfield’s freewheeling led to two costly fumbles that resulted in points, and got himself banged up to boot. Kerry Cooks’ secondary might as well have still been in timeout, the result would have been the same. Tackling was seemingly a question on a postgraduate exam in quantum physics. Oh, and hey, I’ve got an idea – why not throw ANOTHER east-west swing pass, it’s sure to work this time!
- I DON’T CARE WHAT PLANET YOU COME FROM (part 2): When your team has fifteen minutes to protect a 25-point lead and you’re giving up touchdown bombs at will, while at the same time neither moving the ball nor killing the clock, I don’t care what planet you come from — you’re either playing bad, playing stupid, or – as in our case – both. I’m still trying to figure out whether Kenny Hill was more like Joe Montana or Dan Marino after blowing up for 449 yards and 5 touchdowns. There is NO denying that any preseason expectations of our secondary could only have been the result of a bad LSD trip. Worst yet, our esteemed coaching staff looked like they were unqualified to change a diaper, which, sadly enough, became the one job they had. I think I can safely say that this was the worst Sooners performance I’ve seen since OU was humiliated by Johnny Manziel and aTm in the Cotton Bowl.
- In the end, it’s cliché because it’s true: a win is a win. The good was really good, and showed what promise this team has – the Negative Nancies can’t say otherwise. The bad was really bad, and showed what we most fear – us Sunshine Pumpers can’t deny it.
- With all the big plays for both teams, though, I couldn’t help but be reminded of Greg Maddux and Tom Glavine in 1998: chicks dig the longball.
- (Side note: it’s kinda funny that this video starts with them asking about Mark McGuire, “How long are they gonna worship this guy?”)
- But oh, my friends… now? Now it’s Texas week.
- As I did last year, I’m breaking my weekly bullets into two segments this week. Because everything’s bigger in hating Texas.
- There are some things in this world I hate. I hate mosquitoes. I hate people who cut in line. I hate automated phone trees. But y’all, there’s that kind of hate, but then there’s TEXAS Hate. Texas Hate is something else, something bigger, something otherworldly. Texas Hate is bigger, grander, epic, majestic, imperial…. Texas Hate, for me, is downright Shakespearian.
- “We have now no thought in us but France” said Henry V when he decided it was time to go to war. As Harry was to Paris, so shall we be to Dallas. I want us to sack Shane Buechele like Henry sacked Harfleur. I want our passes to fall like arrows onto the field of Agincourt. I want poets to later write of Baker Mayfield after this year’s Texas game: “And at his heels, leashed in like hounds, should famine, sword, and fire crouch for employment....” I’ll write more about this before the RRR, but for now, whether you’re a Sunshine Pumper or a Negative Nancy, this week? This week, we have now no thought in us but Beat the Hell Out of saxeT. Let’s go be bad guys.
- Peace and love Sooners fans. And hey, anyone out there, what time is it…?