clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:


In which the author unleashes several weeks of pent-up snark. I apologize if it’s “tl;dr.”

John Rieger-USA TODAY Sports

  • Happy Monday, Sooners fans!  Apologies for my absence for the last few Mondays.  Between a family illness and work and vacation, my grade as an occasional columnist this season is clearly an Incomplete.  I’ll try to do some quick make-up work by zipping through my missed assignments:
  • TEXAS: 17-24. I still haven’t even watched the Texas game.  Don’t feel inclined to.  I’ll go ahead and take this F on my grade sheet.
    • And for the record, I am personally banning myself from using any variant on the words, “If we had only beaten Texas.”  That ship has sailed, I’m moving on, and suggest everyone else does, too.  Unless, you know, you like piers.  Piers are pretty cool, sure.
  • KANSAS STATE: 55-0. Purple Kansas scheduled Oklahoma for homecoming; Purple Kansas chose poorly.  While the score here is nice, upon re-watching the game, I would argue against feeling too good about it.  OU played very well, and the statistics are certainly garish, but we were definitely helped by the fact that K-STATE WAS ALLERGIC TO TACKLING! Seriously, the Wildcats put on a clinic out there: Coach Bill Snyder’s Tackling Clinic of How Not to Do It.  It was an uncharacteristic game from the Wizard’s squad, and made us look better than we should have.
    • The game was effectively over when Snyder pulled his quarterback in the second quarter.  K-State has just had too many injuries this year.  I respect Coach Snyder immensely, and don’t want this to be his last season in Manhattan.
    • OU’s defense played out of their minds.  Mike Stoops called a gem.
    • Baker Mayfield completed at least one pass to every human being on the planet Earth.  I think his one attempt to the astronauts aboard the International Space Station was completed, but negated due to penalty.  I still contend that the biggest difference between Riley-Mayfield and Heupel-Knight can be summed up in four words: “It ain’t just Shep.”
    • Trevor Knight received extended playing time.
  • TEXAS TECH: 63-27. I like to call this game “We Have a Samaje Perine And You Do Not.”  Texas Tech’s spongy defensive line give Riley the perfect chance to let the big dog eat, and he and Mixon certainly feasted.
    • I was tempted to try to prove an existing point by just saying “Mike Stoops called a gem” again, but that doesn’t do justice to how well our defense played in this game.  Dakota Austin shone in relief of the early-injured Sanchez, and TTU’s Patrick Mahomes was forced into probably his worst game since that time he challenged Garry Kasparov to a chess match.
    • Austin Seibert missed a field goal.  Let’s have campus-wide tryouts immediately.
    • I generally don’t like to get involved in smack-talking, but to some (not all) of those guys over at Viva The Matadors?  I truly mean this in the most southern way I can when I say, “Oh, bless your hearts.”
    • Trevor Knight received extended playing time.
  • KANSAS: 62-7. Blue Kansas scheduled [anyone] for homecoming.  Blue Kansas didn’t have a choice.  Blue Kansas wrote Charlie Weis another paycheck to not be their coach.  Blue Kansas wonders why exactly they fired Mark Mangino again.  Blue Kansas has a heckuva guy in Coach Beaty, who has a tougher job than you do.  Blue Kansas will be good in basketball this year.
    • There is absolutely nothing noteworthy about this game for Oklahoma fans to know except that Jonathan Alvarez was injured, and we need him to get better soon.
    • Trevor Knight received extended playing time.
  • Because of my age and when I attended OU, I refuse to call Perine and Mixon “Thunder and Lightning.”  That is now and will forever be Jerald Moore and James Allen for me.  Under Lincoln Riley, I have yet to see anything that will make me believe these guys will get the touches to even come close to the DeMarco Murray/Chris Brown tandem.  Just my opinion.
  • The European Space Agency’s Rosetta spacecraft has detected what they think is oxygen -- dioxygen (O2), to be precise -- streaming from comet 67P.  Ours is an amazing universe, my friends, and there is much yet to learn.
  • So here we are in November, and the fun is getting ready to begin.  You know, Baylor, TCU, and Stillwater.  Oh, what’s that?  The Iowa State Cyclones?
  • Attack of the ‘Clones? I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, Bob Stoops doesn’t lose trap games.  We lose games we shouldn’t, but never because Stoops overlooks opponents.
  • Iowa State under Paul Rhoads has been consistently on the cusp between Okay and Pretty-Good since taking over the Cyclones in 2009, and anyone who would overlook him and his squad is just plain country-dumb.  (See also: Justin Blackmon and #2 Oklahoma State in 2011, and the Cowboys’ shot at playing for the Natty going bye-bye.)
    • Coming off of a shutout win against saxeT, they’re feeling pretty good.  Quarterback Joel Lanning made his first career start and went 19-37 for 188 yards and a touchdown.  Meh, okay.  But LB Jordan Harris was a Walter Camp national player of the week, as the Longhorns couldn’t do anything except QB runs all day long.  The Cyclones are a time-of-possession squad, and my biggest fear for this game is Oklahoma getting off to a slow start like they did early this year.
    • We’re at the point in the season where we need style points.  If OU doesn’t win by at least three touchdowns, we’re not moving in the polls much no matter what happens.
    • I expect Trevor Knight to receive extended playing time.
  • Unrelated to anything else here: #StillwaterStrong.  An OU YouTuber I follow put it better than I can.
  • WHEN THIS SEASON BEGAN, I was predicting that OU would have 2-3 losses on the season.  I’m still holding to that prediction, although I’m giving myself a bit of wiggle room for optimism.  Our offensive line is progressing, although it’s still nowhere near last year’s.  Here lately, though, the defense has been showing me that my preseason expectations of it might have been low.  TCU is really good; Baylor is really good; Little Brother is really good.  But I think that if our defense stays at this level, we can beat all of them.  We’ll see.
  • Peace and love, Sooners fans!  Apologies for the long post.  If you read through the whole thing, you deserve to sneak into your leftover Halloween candy.  Just don’t take all the Reese’s, that’s rude.